TEN YEARS OF SEATTLE WIFFLE

June 29, 2024
Preston Sahabu, Commissioner
the poster that started it all
Never forget where you came from.

Ten years ago, plain text posters began appearing on telephone poles and street lampposts around Seattle. This summer, by some miracle of the Cowen gods, we will complete an uninterrupted decade of sport, chaos, and community. It's time to celebrate.

July 13: Inaugural In-Season Tournament

To upgrade our All-Star Game for the next decade, we are launching the In-Season Tournament on Saturday July 13th, at Cowen Park from 10am to 8pm. Your $30 entry fee gets you drafted to a one-day squad, a brand new Seattle Wiffle tanktop, a commemorative bandana, and the finest Costco catering in the North Seattle area. Plus, the winning team claims the prize pot!

Fun wrinkles include team seeding minigames, two-out innings, and short mound slugfests. Anyone who has ever played in Seattle Wiffle is eligible. Sign up now!

In-Season Tournament
ChatGPT trophy for demonstration purposes only. Actual trophy subject to regulatory approval.
August 4: Hall of Fame Celebration

Let's have an August party fit for our tenth season. This year we will induct the first ten players of our Hall of Fame on the last day of the regular season, Sunday August 4th at Cowen Park. Come for the party, stay for the matchups! We will start the induction ceremony at 12:30pm, immediately followed by a grill-and-keg reception. Hall of Fame selection process coming soon!

August 25: World Series and Consolation Final

The top six will make the playoff bracket. The last three, and the two teams bounced in the first playoff round, will be in the consolation bracket. Both finals will happen on Sunday August 25th at Cowen Park, schedule TBD.

Winter: Awards Banquet and Highlight Reel

We still have awards to give out, and with some offseason to prepare we will put together an amazing highlight reel. Date and location TBD, but we will enjoy the warm memories of this summer after the darkness sets in.

X: THE POWER RANKINGS APP

June 30, 2024
Preston Sahabu, Commissioner

As Tim McLaughlin's Big Wiffowskis move on from the league to host Thursday night pickup at Green Lake -- tune into the league Instagram for week-by-week updates -- the remaining nine teams have spent a month jockeying for position. Let's check in.

1. Wiffle House (8-0)

Do these guys ever lose? Even when captain Liam McFeely and his preteen brother Reed go out of town, it seems like they have a whole minor league system to call upon. Someone needs to stop the 3-peat.

2. Bilabial Stops (8-0)

Guess who's back. Back again. Nick Usoff and Noah Purcell are back. Tell a friend. Yet despite the return of Home Run Hercules and The Stat Man, the Stops offense continues to be a bit sluggish. Good thing they've still got captain Eddie Brown and groundskeeper Paul Rogers.

3. Swingdome (6-4)

Wily captain Jimmy Froio is up to his old tricks again. As of press time, he somehow has a sub-1.00 ERA. The squad's Memorial Day weekend sweep of the Juice has propelled them to the top of the middle, with a few close losses to the teams ahead of them.

4. American Dreams (6-0)

Captain Jeremy Salvo is taking the reins of a new squad, merging with last year's Dingers and Swingers to create a formidable challenger. Jeff Hanschmann is pitching like a man posessed, but we still need them to earn their Red Badge of Courage against stronger competition.

5. Sheryl Crows (3-7)

While neighborhood dad captain Eric Sanford and his squad might have a grizzly looking record, their incessant prayers to Saint BABIP have not been in vain. Their offense powered to a clutch win over the Juice last week, putting them in solid playoff position headed into their two-week bye

6. 100% Real Juice (3-7)

Matt Morris is officially re-entering his pitcher era, called back up to service as captain Gabe Showalter tries to stabilize his bullpen. They still took care of business against the Chickens, building a strong firewall at the bottom of the playoff cutoff.

7. Chicken & Wiffles (0-6)

Captain Matt Pearson is rolling with a new flock this year, with newcomers Jackson Roah, Kelly Ver Duin, and Shellie Raleigh stepping up to the plate. Sometimes it's less about the scoreboard and more about the small victories, as majestic home runs and first hits abound.

8. Berserkers (0-6)

With another infusion of fresh blood, and some serious offseason training from starter Noah Duszynski, the potential for captain Wallace Tillman is still there. As elder rookie Greg Markles put it, the improvement is there every week, pushing for a breakthrough.

9. West Coast Washout (0-4)

Andrew Winter returns to captain duties for a new-old squad, keeping things in the family with the return of cousin Conor Roberson and taking on several other new players. As with most new teams, while hitting ain't easy, pitching can feel almost impossible. Long live the Washout!

2024 Final Regular Season Standings
2024 Final League Leaders
Batting leaders based on a minimum of 50 plate appearances.
Pitching leaders based on a minimum of 16 innings pitched.